Thinking back on some common threads any therapist working with school-aged children will see on a regular basis, the theme of impulsivity and impulse control comes to mind. Early childhood is marked by wide variations in behavior but for some young children, the presence of developmentally immature impulse control strains the patience of parents and teachers. This may be seen in behaviors including trouble keeping their hands to themselves or inappropriate and goofy statements. Play dates disappear as word gets around to other parents, self-esteem suffers under the weight of admonishments from authorities, and parents narrow the child’s exposure to certain people and places due to the impulse triggers lurking in life.
Consider these tips to help your child improve impulse control:
Introduce simple strategies
Introducing simple strategies under controlled conditions can be beneficial. These techniques should be practiced at home and rehearsed before events potential issues can arise. For example, if you know your child tends to impulsively meltdown during sports, model how to “breathe” when playing ball with them by taking deep breaths after every ten throws during baseball or basketball.
Another idea is creating an imaginary "pause button" to use during times when they must contend with one of their impulse triggers. Create a physical form of "touching this pause button that is easy to remember like touching your forehead or snapping your fingers until they learn how to do it silently in their mind.
Develop fun games
My favorite impulse control technique? Games! Not only are games fun, they can be incredibly therapeutic especially for some impulsive children. Any board game requiring turn-taking will function as healthy impulse control practice. Consider giving extra praise to children who remember to put their hands in their lap after their turn. Parents are often surprised at how quickly children generalize these techniques to classroom and home life.
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